David Dickson’s beautiful, gospel centered dying words

David Dickson was a 17th century Scottish pastor. When lying on his death bed, a friend of 50 years asked him how he found himself. He answered: “I have taken all my good deeds and all my bad deeds; and cast them through each other in a heap before the Lord; and fled from both; and have taken myself to the Lord Jesus Christ; and in Him I have sweet peace.” 

(from Truth’s Victory Over Error, page xxi)

Invictus vs. My Captain

How do you respond to the afflictions, trials, and suffering that is our lot in a fallen world? So often, we respond by collapsing under the weight of them, even to the point of taking our own lives; by trying to escape the pain in all manner of idols, whether alcohol or sex or shopping sprees or work or 24 hour sports TV or movies; by a stoic resignation; by a fierce bitterness again other people, “the man,” or God Himself; or by a self-courage that pulls itself together and relies upon itself by a mighty act of the will.

Or, by the grace of God, we can respond like Habakkuk. While not denying the pain and confusion of his trials, he confessed his faith in one of the most beautiful declarations in all the Bible: “I heard and my inward parts trembled, at the sound my lips quivered. Decay enters my bones, and in my place I tremble. Because I must wait quietly for the day of distress, for the people to arise who will invade us. Though the fig tree should not blossom and there be no fruit on the vines, though the yield of the olive should fail and the fields produce no food, though the flock should be cut off from the fold and there be no cattle in the stalls, yet I will exult in the Lord, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation. The Lord God is my strength, and He has made my feet like hinds’ feet, and makes me walk on my high places” (Habakkuk 3:16-19).

These two responses have been eloquently expressed in poetry, the first by William Ernest Henley’s poem “Invictus,” and the second by Dorothea Day’s poem “My Captain.” The contrast is stark. “Through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God,” said Paul in Acts 14:22 – may the Lord give you grace to sing the song on the right as you journey to glory!

Out of the night that covers me,                        Out of the light that dazzles me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,                     Bright as the sun from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be                            I thank the God I know to be
For my unconquerable soul.                               For Christ the conqueror of my soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance                     Since His the sway of circumstance,
I have not winced nor cried aloud.                   I would not wince nor cry aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance                    Under that rule which men call chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.                      My head with joy is humbly bowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears               Beyond this place of sin and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,                  That life with Him! And His the aid,
And yet the menace of the years                        Despite the menace of the years,
Finds and shall find me unafraid.                       Keeps, and shall keep me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,                    I have no fear, though strait the gate,
How charged with punishment the scroll,     He cleared from punishment the scroll.
I am the master of my fate                                    Christ is the Master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.                                 Christ is the Captain of my soul.

— William Ernest Henley                                           — Dorothea Day

The inaugural issue of POPC’s new online journal is here!

Notes From the Orchard, the online journal of Pear Orchard Presbyterian Church, has just come out with its first issue this week. This periodic publication (monthly? biweekly? only time will tell…) will include writings from POPC church staff, as well as members, and friends from church history and from the church today. The articles will aim to be short, yet rich and full of meat for you to dig your teeth into. Here’s the contents of issue #1:

– Is Your Marriage a Covenant of Works or a Covenant of Grace, by Dr. John Kwasny
– The Benefits of Afflictions, by Mr. Caleb Cangelosi
– The Gospel and the Incarnation, by Dr. William Swan Plumer (1802-1880)
– Moving Forward: God’s Call for Redemptive Ethnic Unity, by Mr. Lance Lewis

We hope you enjoy it!

“The gospel is better than unconditional love…” David Powlison

From David Powlison’s excellent article on idolatry and motivation, “Idols of the Heart and ‘Vanity Fair'”:

What happens to the Gospel when idolatry themes are not grasped?  “God loves you” typically becomes a tool to meet a need for self-esteem in people who feel like failures.  The particular content of the Gospel of Jesus Christ—”grace for sinners and deliverance for the sinned¬against”—is down-played or even twisted into “unconditional acceptance for the victims of others’ lack of acceptance.”  Where “the Gospel” is shared, it comes across something like this: “God accepts you just as you are.  God has unconditional love for you.”  That is not the biblical Gospel, however.  God’s love is not Rogerian unconditional positive regard writ large.  A need theory of motivation—rather than an idolatry theory—bends the Gospel solution into “another gospel” which is essentially false.

The Gospel is better than unconditional love.  The Gospel says, “God accepts you just as Christ is.  God has ‘contraconditional’ love for you.”  Christ bears the curse you deserve.  Christ is fully pleasing to the Father and gives you His own perfect goodness.  Christ reigns in power, making you the Father’s child and coming close to you to begin to change what is unacceptable to God about you. God never accepts me “as I am.”  He accepts me “as I am in Jesus Christ.”  The center of gravity is different.  The true Gospel does not allow God’s love to be sucked into the vortex of the soul’s lust for acceptability and worth in and of itself.  Rather, it radically decenters people—what the Bible calls “fear of the Lord” and “faith”—to look outside themselves.

Wisdom from Westminster #1 – God Has Made Himself Known

Although the light of nature, and the works of creation and providence do so far manifest the goodness, wisdom, and power of God, as to leave men unexcusable;1 yet are they not sufficient to give that knowledge of God, and of his will, which is necessary unto salvation.2 Therefore it pleased the Lord, at sundry times, and in divers manners, to reveal himself, and to declare that his will unto his church;3 and afterwards, for the better preserving and propagating of the truth, and for the more sure establishment and comfort of the church against the corruption of the flesh, and the malice of Satan and of the world, to commit the same wholly unto writing:4 which maketh the Holy Scripture to be most necessary;5 those former ways of God’s revealing his will unto his people being now ceased.6

  1. Rom. 1:19-20; 1:32-2:1; 2:14-15; Psa. 19:1-4
  2. John 17:3; I Cor. 1:21; 2:13-14
  3. Heb. 1:1-2
  4. Luke 1:3-4; Rom. 15:4; Matt. 4:4, 7, 10; Isa. 8:20
  5. II Tim. 3:15; II Peter 1:19
  6. John 20:31; I Cor. 10:11; 14:37; I John 5:13; Heb. 1:1-2; 2:2-4

It is always fitting to turn your thoughts to the glorious reality that God has made Himself known to you. He has written His law upon your heart, and placed your conscience within you. He has hung the moon and stars in the sky, and covered the earth was splendor and beauty. He has also sustained and governed all His creatures and all their actions, working all things according to the counsel of His will. So whether you gaze within your soul, around at the creation, or back in time, you see His divine attributes and His holy will. God has made the truth about Himself clearly evident to every man, woman, boy and girl.

Yet in itself, because of your sinful state by nature, this knowledge serves only to render you inexcusable. It heightens your guilt, because instead of humbly receiving and submitting to it, you reject and suppress it in sinful rebellion. You need more than facts, you need to be rescued from yourself. Yet you will not find the way of salvation by looking solely within, or meditating on the beauty of creation, or studying the history of mankind. To know God fully, you must look to the Bible, in which He has perfectly told you about Himself; about His eternal Son, who came into this world to live and die for the salvation of His people; and about His Holy Spirit, who powerfully reveals the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth to those for whom Christ died.

The Scriptures are absolutely necessary, and thus as we are still in the early days of this new year, resolve by His grace to give yourselves to the reading, studying, memorizing, meditating, and communicating of them. When was the last time you read through the entire Bible? Are you remembering more readily each year where stories and passages are found in the Scriptures? Are you growing in your knowledge of God through Jesus Christ day by day? Have you hidden His word in your heart that you might not sin against Him? Does the word of Christ dwell richly in your speech and thoughts? Do you know where to turn to answer the questions of the seeker or skeptic, or to encourage and exhort the wayward or wounded believer? Let your life more and more every day evidence for the necessity of the Bible.

On Turning 40 – Some Reflections from the Top of the Hill

Today is my 40th birthday. When I was a younger man, I used to journal. Then I got married, and the thoughts I had formerly put onto paper I tended to share with my wife. Then blogging was created, and some of my meditations were funneled to this medium (no, I didn’t stop speaking to my wife). But it’s been some time since I last wrote anything of substance even here. James Adair Lyon, a Presbyterian pastor in Columbus, MS, in the 19th century, kept an extensive journal throughout his life and ministry, and every year on his birthday in April he would take occasion to reflect upon how things stood with him, how his health fared, how he was doing spiritually, etc. Since I’m turning 40 I’ve already scheduled a well-visit with my doctor (the first one I can remember, thank you Blue Cross Blue Shield for “free” well visit checkups!), and it’s probably a good time as well to pick up the pen/keyboard and take stock of things from this vantage point. If I’m now “over the hill,” I suppose today I’m at the top of the hill, so perhaps I can see more than I’ve seen before.

Lots of things have been running through my mind. I definitely feel more mature, shall we say. A friend gave me a Jawbone UP wearable step/sleep monitor. He told me when he gave it to me, “You’re turning 40, it’s time to start monitoring things.” I probably never would bought it for myself, but  the stats from the first few days have been sobering; I live a far more sedentary lifestyle than I realized. What my friend really was saying to me with his gift was, “Time to start walking, old man!” I’ve always been thankful for my receding hairline and the gray in my beard, because it covered up some of my youthfulness and inexperience as a pastor. Now there’s not as much youthfulness to cover up (though I’m still thankful for the gray – Prov. 16:31 and 20:29!). As providence would have it, however, I’m teaching the oldest Sunday School class at our church this quarter, and so as I’ve thought about turning 40, I’ve at the same time thought about the fact that several of the members of my Sunday School class were my age when I was born in 1976. Age is relative.

What is 40 years? 40 years is longer than Jesus lived on earth. It’s the amount of time the Israelites wandered in the wilderness. It’s the length of time Saul reigned over Israel (Acts 13:21), David reigned over Israel (II Sam. 5:4), and Solomon reigned over Israel (II Chron. 9:30). Isaac was 40 when he married Rebekah (Gen. 25:20). Moses was 40 when he first rose up to defend and deliver Israel (Acts 7:23-25). And Caleb was 40 years old when he was sent by Moses into the land of Canaan as a spy (Josh. 14:7). A friend in his 60s said that his 40s were some of the best days of his life: his income was high and his health was superb. That’s great to hear. Yet it’s easy to hit the age of 40 and become discouraged, as I have a bit, because you realize you’ve likely lived half your life (“As for the days of our life, they contain seventy years, or if due to strength, eighty years, yet their pride is but labor and sorrow; for soon it is gone and we fly away” – Psalm 90:10), and you look back and wonder what you’ve accomplished. Have I done what I thought I would do by now? Have I been useful and productive, used of God in the lives of others? Have I impacted other people? Have I been a force for good and grace in the world and in individuals’ lives? Have I become who I thought I would be by now? Have I grown and helped others to grow? By God’s grace I believe I can say I have to some small degree. Sermons have been preached, people have been falteringly pastored, books have been read, articles have been written, even a book co-authored with my dad and brother. Projects have been finished, things have been built, gardens have been grown, trails have been hiked, waterfalls have been swum in, frisbees have been thrown, songs have been sung, skills have been learned. My five children seem to be growing in grace and knowledge. I hopefully am becoming more patient, gentle and humble, more knowledgeable of the Bible, more like Christ.

But there are many things that still feel (and are) incomplete, unfulfilled, unfinished. Goals have passed by, unmet – as well, I realize that I haven’t have enough concrete goals of “things I’d like to do by or before I turn 40.” Looking back, I wish I would have. I might have attained some of them. Or I might not have. Immediately upon thinking these things, though, I realize that God has allowed and enabled me to do some things I never thought I would, or that I never saw coming; and even more importantly, that life is about far more than accomplishing things, getting things done, producing things. How easy it is to make an idol out of accomplishments, whether accomplishments accomplished or accomplishments that failed to get accomplished. What matters supremely is not what I have accomplished, but what Christ has accomplished for me through His righteousness and blood. The words of the Keith and Kristyn Getty hymn “My Worth is Not in What I Own” have resounded in my mind today:

My worth is not in what I own
Not in the strength of flesh and bone
But in the costly wounds of love
At the cross

My worth is not in skill or name
In win or lose, in pride or shame
But in the blood of Christ that flowed
At the cross

I rejoice in my Redeemer
Greatest Treasure,
Wellspring of my soul
I will trust in Him, no other.
My soul is satisfied in Him alone.

As summer flowers we fade and die
Fame, youth and beauty hurry by
But life eternal calls to us
At the cross

I will not boast in wealth or might
Or human wisdom’s fleeting light
But I will boast in knowing Christ
At the cross

Two wonders here that I confess
My worth and my unworthiness
My value fixed – my ransom paid
At the cross

I was struck last night in our family worship as we read through the first part of Luke 7 by the words of the centurion with the sick slave. The centurion is lauded as “worthy” of Jesus’ attention and healing by the Jewish elders whom he sent on his behalf, because of his love for Israel and his accomplishments – “…it was he who built us our synagogue.” Yet when Jesus comes, the man has a different estimation of himself: “Lord, do not trouble yourself further, for I am not worthy for You to come under my roof; for this reason I did not even consider myself worthy to come to You…” He may not have understood everything Peter understood in Luke 5:8 about his sin yet, but he knew that accomplishments don’t make the man, nor do they commend anyone to God. The cross, the blood of God’s Son, alone can do that. In that cross we see both our worth and our unworthiness – glorious paradox! What I’ve done in the span of 40 years doesn’t commend me to God, for indeed, what have I done that He did not enable me to do? What strength, intellect, ability, skill, ingenuity, creativity, foresight, daring, good fortune, determination or passion do any of us have that does not come from Him? So even in those things we might point to and say, “There, Lord, look at what I did!”, God is sixpence none the richer, no different than my children using my money to buy me birthday presents this morning.

Yet while the dangers of idolatry and self-righteousness lie always at hand, it is vitally important to seek and strive to work and labor productively by the grace of God, for the glory of God and for the good of others. For He does enable us to accomplish great things, even greater things, because Jesus has gone to the Father and has given us His Holy Spirit. Our Savior’s food was to do the will of Him who sent Him and to accomplish His work (John 4:34); and He said at the close of His life that He had accomplished the work God gave Him to do. Each of us has a work(s), great or small, that God has given us to do. With Paul therefore let us say, “I labor, striving according to his power, which mightily works within me” (Col. 1:29). James Lyon, the aforementioned Presbyterian pastor in Columbus, MS, meditated often on his usefulness, or perceived lack thereof. His journal entries, while seeming at times to come close to self-centeredness and pride (are yours or mine any different?), are honest expressions of this very dependent determination. At the age of 38, he wrote,

I am now thirty eight years old…I sometimes feel a little appalled with the impression that I am verging out of youth onto middle life without having attained that eminent usefulness for which I have hoped and still long to reach – I feel however that all my previous life has been a most wholesome discipline, and that all my trials have been most salutary as a preparation for great usefulness. Consequently my ardor is unabated and my hope of great usefulness is yet buoyant. The only discouraging thought is that the older I grow and greater my preparations for great usefulness – the more I see of my deficiency and the wider field of preparation seems to open before me, so that sometimes I feel that my whole life will be consumed in getting ready for the great usefulness which I have hoped and still hope to accomplish.

When he thought he might lose his voice (a preacher’s primary tool), he expressed dismay yet trust in the providence of God:

A failure of my voice would completely eclipse all my prospects for this world – for all my plans for usefulness and distinction presuppose the use of my voice, either in preaching or lecturing. Consequently the thought of being deprived of the use of my voice, casts a perfect gloom over my earthly hopes – But I have consolation in the conviction which is strong enough to afford me considerable comfort, and for which I trust I feel thankful, that let come what will, the Lord will most assuredly work all things together for good to them that love him, which I humbly trust I do. He has proved himself a Father to me of transcendent kindness, mercy mingled with justice, over which infinite wisdom has presided – Therefore if it is the Lord’s will to take my voice from me, instead of answering my earnest and importunate prayers to the contrary, and to seal my lips, I will try to say the Lord’s will be done – and to wait with patience until I can manifestly see his gracious design in doing so…

Most striking of his entries was the following:

I am not devoid of ambition, sanctified and consequently commendable I hope, to make my mark in the world, and to leave a monument behind me by which coming generations shall remember me with admiration and gratitude…I would infinitely rather die and leave no memorial behind, than to build one of insubstantial materials which would soon crumble to dust… I much prefer not being known at all, than to be known as a mediocrity now. Let me build, if I build at all, with granite and the hardest rock…

The great irony of course, is that no one knows of James Lyon today, and yet he was one of the most influential and useful ministers of his day. I too – you too – will be forgotten, and our accomplishments will fade away into the sands of Ozymandias.

I remembered again this morning that I share a birthday with Rush Limbaugh. He was born in 1951, and so is 65 years old today. I would imagine he has probably accomplished/produced more and impacted more people between the time he was 40 (and I was 15) and now, than he did from age 20-40. That’s encouraging. It also reminds me of the words of my namesake in Joshua 14:10-11 – “…and now behold, I am eighty-five years old today. I am still as strong today as I was in the day Moses sent me; as my strength was then, so my strength is now, for war and for going out and coming in.” Now those are fighting words! If the Lord allows me to live to 45, 65 or even 85, I hope that by His grace I will continue to have the same strength – of body and soul – that I feel within myself today. Reader, pray for me, as you pray for yourself, that we will be able to navigate the Scylla and Charybdis of pride and passivity, that we will have the same dependent determination of James Lyon, that by God’s grace we will redeem the time, and productively and usefully build, if we build at all, with granite and the hardest rock. And on every monument let us engrave, “Soli Deo Gloria” – “To God Alone Be the Glory.”

The Christian’s struggle to believe the gospel every day

“It is to be feared that there be many who in words are able to distinguish hush between the law and gospel, and in their judgments hold and maintain, that man is justified by faith without the works of the law; and yet in effect and practice, that is to say, in heart and conscience, do otherwise. And there is some touch of this in us all, otherwise we should not be so up and down in our comforts and believing as we are still, and cast down with every weakness as we are.” The Marrow of Modern Divinity


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